First off, it’s important to understand that your guys should pick the fun…not you. If you’re always seen as the leader, it’ll separate you too much from the pack. Here’s how to get someone else to do the dirty work…bring up the idea of having fun to one of the guys who you know will be excited about it. Get him talking about ideas and when he lands on a good one, tell him to bring it up with the guys. When he does, don’t say anything; just be onboard. And when you go out, don’t drive – ride in the backseat.

Let it be pure fun

You might be tempted to pick something that develops teamwork, like an obstacle course where everyone has to work together. We’d like to talk you out of that. It’s best if everyone knows that fun means fun…not “an exercise in bonding.” If you decide to swim with sharks and have to pry jaws off your buddy’s leg while the others are stabbing the shark with scuba knives…that seems ok, but don’t construct false teamwork scenarios.

Make it take a long time

Sometimes you need an overnighter. Don’t be afraid to ask for it. The wives should know by now that firepit is a good thing for their men and should be onboard. Even if one of them isn’t, they won’t want to be the one woman who objects. Throw everyone in one or two cars, roll the windows down, and get out of town.

Or a short time

Monday night football. Thursday night football. Sunday night football. Cigar bar. Ax throwing, Poker…pick a vice…they all work.

Do stuff people haven’t done

One of the guys in our group had never shot a gun. Another had never used a chainsaw. We thought no one had been spelunking, until after we came out of the cave and one of the guys said he’d done it as a kid and found a dead body…a story he’d never thought to tell us. He was confronting that fear the whole time he was down in that cave with us…but too afraid in the moment to say anything. (It was actually pretty cool.)

Get home safe

Think through the obvious stuff and be prepared. When we take a camping trip, one guy has a phone, one guy has a gun (for the animals, not the humans), and one guy is designated “first aid guy.” And if it’s a night out and there’s drinking involved, get a designated driver. Scars and stories are cool, but hospitals aren’t. So have fun, but make sure everyone makes it back ok.